The
Baby Blue Martini
As
always insight comes to me in the latest hour of the evening.On
this particular evening the martini was not all about
fun and love, it was about something much more serious
but somehow it always ends up having something to do with
sex. Thank god there is the consistency in life of a good
martini and good sex. What would we do without either
of those? It would be a mighty boring time on this planet.
This was a night where some consoling of a dear friend
was in order. It was not the fluffy consoling about some
date not working out or the on going relationship issues,
it was about a major life decision. The one that can change
life as we know it forever. NO! It is not marriage! It
is babies! Yes! The big "B" word.
The issue I was talking
to my dearest girlfriend about was not the decision to
have babies; her and her husband has already made that
decision. The issue was that after a year of trying she
was not yet pregnant. The issue was should she keep trying?
A woman’s biggest fear is not being able to conceive
a baby. When I arrived at our regular martini bar, after
the desperate "need a martini!" phone call,
the cocktails where already on the bar and my girlfriend
was one in! Whew! She was upset because she usually only
ever drinks one! I saw the pain in her eyes as I sat down
and just leaned over and gave her a huge hug. The tears
started to spill out of her eyes so I just kept hugging
and wiping away her tears. What is wrong? I asked. I got
my period this afternoon, she answered. Oh shit!"
I thought as I took a long sip of my martini, this was
not going to be good! She laughed as she told me that
she had ordered us the Baby Blue martini, she thought
it was quite fitting. Well at least it tastes good and
easies the pain, I stated. But this was a true fact, this
martini was delicious. A blend of vodka and blue curacao
which gives a nice orange flavor and the addition on sour
mix to balance it all out, and one of my favorite garnishes
a cherry which makes it look so pretty.
After a few sips
the disappointment all came pouring out, she was so upset
because she had been 4 days late and has started to think
that she might actually be pregnant! She was so tired
of feeling like a failure by not being able to conceive.
She was frustrated by the constant thoughts of what day
was it, what her temperature was, how far away was her
husband in case they needed to have sex in the next few
hours. She was frustrated by all the tests, shots and
hormones. She was a wreck and she knew it, but the desire
to conceive a child was consuming her, it was all she
thought about, her life with a baby. It was like she could
not enjoy she life now because she was so obsessed by
trying to get pregnant and if one more person told her
to relax and let it go, she was going to hit them. To
add salt to the wound our other friend was dealing with
the issue of having an abortion. "Why is it so unfair,
I want a baby and can’t have one and she doesn’t
want one and gets one!" she cried. I felt her pain
and frustration as I held her hand and waved at the bartender
for another round of Baby Blue martinis.
“What
is it that makes a woman decide that her life is not complete
without having a baby?”
.
.
