A
lot of us where scared of being taken advantage of,
we were sick of footing the bill for boyfriends that
we where in love with. Serious role reversal on that
one, ya think? We could easily say that we loved a man
and wanted to be with them for ever, but when circumstances
changed and we where faced with possibility of adjusting
our lifestyle, moving or changing careers, we all of
a sudden hesitated and the reality of love became extremely
overwhelming.
It was true, my
ego had taken over. My fear and ego had created the
internal critic that opened up all the questions of
doubt. The thoughts of: Why am I sacrificing my lifestyle
and friends to be with this man? Why am I adjusting
my life and career to follow him? Why am I buying the
house and paying for more then he is? Then there are
the doubt questions of: What if it does not work out?
What will I lose? Do I need a prenup? Is it worth the
risk? Can I believe that he is going to take care of
me? These were the critic questions that I and many
other women had faced. When the ego kicks in it is amazing
how you begin to think as an "I" instead of
a "We". It is always easier to be single;
you can be selfish with your time, energy and money.
You do not have someone pushing your boundaries and
challenging you to be a better person. The internal
critic is constantly making the comment of what you
are giving up but what we forget is what we are gaining:
Love! People always say that when you meet the "one"
your desire to be with this person over takes your fear
of commitment. I do not believe that to be true. As
we get older it is so much easier to walk away, because
we have done it before and even though we know that
ending a relationship is not the funniest thing in the
world to do, we know we will survive. It is always easier
to run away then to see it through. However, there is
always that nagging doubt that the love, passion and
energy that you share with this person you may never
find again. Desire does not get a woman over her commitment
phobia; it is a conscious decision, one that only occurs
after you have been busted.
Conclusion:
The CC Cosmopolitan martini
is a refreshing blend of citrus and commitment. When
you break out of your old habitual Cosmo recipe and
try this one, you will be delighted at the new taste
sensations, it is very liberating. With only a splash
of fresh lime and cranberry juice this smooth and strong
martini will give you the push you need to free yourself
from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear
and ego that likes to dress its self up and parade around
as rational hesitation. To commit to this martini or
anything else in your life, is to remove your head as
the barrier to your life and start living it instead
of being afraid of what you might lose. When you fear
losing something you will always end up losing more
than you ever imagined.
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Copyrights:
2005 by Marjory Cheales
